Yet Another

Another great song that you nice readers should check out is: Two Ghosts by Boy Eats Drum Machine on the album Two Ghosts

Seriously, worth a listen. Classic upbeat music that talks about depressing things! YAY haha

No time.

Recently I've posted some stuff on FB that is mostly links to music that I think people should hear.

As I still don't have lots of time, I'm going to try an post more often with just good music.

The latest is Cartel's Song Wasted.

Nocturne in B Major

Several years ago, I was a reprobate, screwing around, and going to college (the first time) and not putting any effort into my future.

To this day, it has been my largest regret by far. It has sent me down a path I never imagined, unconcerned with the outcome. Largely, I am no better for it. I know the value of an education, but still haven't any idea where to go, or what to do with my life. The people I've met along the way have mostly wandered out of my life, with me letting them do so. What a poor shepherd I would make.

I'm not trying to elicit sympathy, nor evoke sadness, but simply to state that the last several years have not worked in my favor. I've sacrificed my youth, and for what? College expenses that were already paid for? I remember that during basic training, on the second week, they issued all trainees the first round of inoculations and they said that if you had an adverse reaction to the drug, you would be removed from the Air Force, no harm, no foul. It happens to less than .01% of trainees. I remarked that if I had an adverse reaction, I would gladly accept getting out of the Air Force, in fact, if they had given me the choice, I would have bowed out then. It wasn't a matter of "Do I have the constitution for this challenge?" It was more a matter of, I've learned my lesson, and I'm ready to be responsible. Alas, it was too late. I think this may have played a large role in why I never had any real USAF spirit. I still believed in what we were doing, but I never got that real sense of pride from my work, or my time in the Air Force.

Now, I'm at the point where I know enough to stick with college, because no matter what I choose, a degree will help me to accomplish it, however, I'm no closer to knowing what I'm supposed to do. Easily enough, I day dream of a perfect life with the fast cars, and big house and beautiful wife, but when it comes to the perfect job, it doesn't really show up clearly. I want to travel, I want to see the world, I want to be part of a team that goes to Mars, something, anything that lets me explore this world. The problem is that nobody will hire a young person such as myself to do these things. I'm not trained, not skilled, and not worthy of these illustrious positions. I know this,and I'm forced to accept this. But this makes a life, my life, (read me) unhappy. A life lived unhappily is a life lived unsatisfied, is a life not worth living.

So how do I change this life I lead? How do I break out of this cycle? I don't. I press on, venting to a computer screen and thus only a few people who have chosen to click the link, and read the page. Perhaps I should look in to a year abroad. Or a life abroad. Enjoy your weekend folks.

Tonight's musical selection comes after much deliberation of classical music, primarily listed to prior the blog being written. I hope you enjoy this Krebs, Fantasie in F minor. It's a beautiful reprise of the original, and compiled by Stephen Malinowski. Enjoy.